Day 136

I’m still here!  ๐Ÿ™‚  Life has been crazy busy.

I’m still sober.  Day 136 and I’m feeling pretty sorted for today.  No strong drinking urges, no stupid little demon telling me it will be okay to try just one.  I’m kind of confident in my sobriety right now, which can certainly be a dangerous thing to say this early on.  But I do feel confident and in a good place.

Our family emergency is still ongoing, still very stressful and needs a lot of attention.  Another rubber-band trip to the big city of Anchorage last weekend.  It’s a pricey place to go in the summer…hotel rooms are asinine expensive.  It’s also just a short enough trip that camping seems like SO MUCH work.

I put a new app on my phone to track meals and calories, steps and workouts and such.  I love it so far.  I love the wiggle room of figuring out what to do with the last 1/3 of my calories…I’m on a pretty restricted diet because I *really* want to see some weight loss, but it’s still fun figuring out how to spend my calorie allotment.  I definitely think it’s a positive thing that I see this as a FUN challenge and not a chore!  That gives me hope that I’ll actually see results by Christmas.

Oh, and Fig Newmans might *say* they’re lowfat, but they’re still the most calorie-laden thing I ate all day.

I’ve been going crazy with the art.  It’s now an established habit for me to stay up until 3a.m., then get up with Little One at about 8:00.  I get about 4 hours of time to listen to podcasts and comedy shows while I do whatever art I can accomplish quietly.  

I’m finding the days so much less onerous—all the little things I do repetitively, (reading books to LO, dishes, folding laundry, etc.) are so much easier to enjoy because I know I can look forward to quiet and peaceful space after they all go to bed.  I wish I’d realized years ago how very important alone time is for me.  I don’t think I was ready to give myself that “treat,” yet.  It’s sad to think of all the ways I have spent years treating myself like a second-class citizen.  I deserve a space and some time of my own just as much as all of my other family members do.  I work hard to make sure they all have time and space to be alone if that’s what they need…at least now I’m learning to give myself the same consideration.

I have a cold that is getting worse by the minute.   Ugh.  Must buy tissues.

On that note, have some pictures!

Beginning to fill up the wall above my work area.  The blue Monet is by a kidlet.
I had SO much fun with this abstract acrylic idea.
Some watercolor paintings I’m not finished with.

I finally finished a bunch of postcards.  Here are a few…I’m thinking of glittering some, but it might not make the post office happy if I do.


Happy Wednesday, everyone!  I’m so happy to be sharing recovery with you!

 

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9 thoughts on “Day 136

  1. You definitely deserve that alone time! And guess what… it’s good for you, which means it’s good for all of those wonderful people who are lucky enough to have you doing all of those wonderful things you do for them. Recharge those batteries as needed! And I keep thinking that if you could get a roll of butcher paper or such that your artwork would make some knock-out gift wrap. ๐Ÿ˜‰
    xo
    d.d.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for that. Especially reminding me that taking care of me lets me take better care of them!

      And I have huge sheets of paper for the packing dishes. I picked it up for Little One, but she prefers more grown-up artwork.

      That’s a brilliant idea ๐Ÿ’ก!

      xo
      Penelope

      Like

  2. It’s just like what the flight attendants tell us to do when we are flying with young kids; PUT THE OXYGEN MASK ON OURSELVES FIRST! That always seemed counter-intuitive to me but these days I say it to myself all the time! It’s a lot harder to do when kids are still young so it’s great you have carved out those cherished hours into the wee hours. I’m so glad you are feeling great too!!! (Btw I have been making bagels like a mad woman because of your bread baking inspiration. I used to bake bread all the time and forgot how therapeutic it was ๐Ÿž๐Ÿž๐Ÿž)
    Xo

    Liked by 1 person

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